


Take Me Home

by just_chip



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Hallucinations, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, PJO AU, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, and writing, bad pacing, someone hug her
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:49:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28154886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_chip/pseuds/just_chip
Summary: It's a terrifying thing, to be in love with someone that doesn't exist. To find a family in figments of your imagination. It's confusing too, because after it feeling so real for so long, you're not exactly sure how to live knowing it was all in your head. You're not sure how to live in general...."I was listening to the oceanI saw a face in the sandBut when I picked it upThen it vanished away from my hands, downI had a dream I was sevenClimbing my way in a treeI saw a piece of heavenWaiting patiently for me, down"
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

It's a terrifying thing, to be in love with someone that doesn't exist. To find a family in figments of your imagination. It's confusing too, because after it feeling so real for so long, you're not exactly sure how to live knowing it was all in your head. You're not sure how to live in general. 

You would think it would be easy to be alone, especially if that's how things were before they came into my life. But now that they were there, making me feel so safe and loved and supported, it's hard to go back. 

Sometimes I catch myself daydreaming about them, and it still feels so real. Like they never left. And I guess in a way they didn't leave. Not really. I just found out what was in my head and what wasn't. It feels more like I lost them, like someone loses anything else. It was my fault, not there's. 

I got diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 17, when my parents finally forced me to get help, and since then nothing about me or my life has been the say, whether it be my looks or my mind. At the time I thought they were the crazy ones. It's been 3 years now, and I've excepted the way things are, because what else am I supposed to do. I never told anyone about the monsters though. Dr. Whitney, my therapist, knows about my "friends," but I never told anyone the "demigod world" I created, and my parents didn't mention it either. But I'll be honest, I'm a bit proud that I managed to create that whole new world in my head.

Sometimes I feel bad, that I miss him more than the rest of my friends. That my thoughts always drift to him before anyone else. He was part of my life since I was 12, he's been a part of everything. And I know that he wasn't real, that any memories I have of us aren't either, that Percy fucking Jackson was never a real part of my life. But I still don't know how to let him go. I can go weeks without spacing off to think about my friends, but he's everywhere. 

I tried dating again, tried making friends, tried not to get my hopes up every time I see some guy with black hair or green eyes. And I still see him, no matter where I go. I won't walk through the park by his apartment where we used to have picnics dates, I won't even walk past his apartment building if I can help it. The worst part is the color blue, and the ocean. I tried so hard to find some comfort in it, I thought it would provide some safety. But every time I see it, or go to the beach, something inside me snaps. It all comes rushing out and my thoughts are too much and I can't breathe and my head hurts and my fingers feel numb and

And I don't think I've ever felt so lost. You would think that the manipulative, abusive parents would be the worst part of my life. Or the loneliness. Or the pitying looks everyone gives me that they think I don't see. But it's him, and every memory or feeling that comes with him. 

A part of me wants to hate him. Of course I can't, though, because my life has never been that easy. It wasn't easy in the demigod world, and it certainly isn't easy now.

But before anyone wants to say "Oh, Annabeth, how could you skip past the whole abusive parents part," there isn't much to say. I can hardly blame then in all honesty. After years of tormenting them about all the monsters I see and how my mother is a goddess, I haven't really made it easy on them. That's what they say, at least. That "parents aren't perfect, and people get angry." I don't have anyone else I can really run to, to deny the things they say, no where to seek comfort. But it's not like I really want it. All the comfort I wants had is gone, and I can't find it in myself to find something else. 

And it's not like they're terrible. Other people have it worse, so I should be thankful. They got me the help I needed, medication, food, a bed. The other day, my step-mother, Helen, bought me a new dress to wear to a party for one of my father's friends. My life isn't as bad as I make it seem to be, I just need to try harder. And that's what I'm going to do. 

I'm rambling too much, aren't I? I started this to help with coping, and here I am, talking about things that don't beed to be said, Dr. Whitney thought it would be good for me to get my feelings out through writing, but I don't know if this has really helped. It's a start, though, and that's all I can really ask for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Runaway by AURORA
> 
> I've had this au in my head for a while so I thought "Hey! Even though I have no writing skills whatsoever, let's make it into a full story." so that's what I'm doing. I woukd rather read someone else write about this, but I guess I'll do it for now. Honestly I'm just hoping it doesn't turn out terribly. Enjoy!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Keep on playing that song that I don't like  
> I just wanna feel normal for the night  
> Keep on kissing that guy that's not my type  
> I just wanna feel normal for the night  
> I should go, it's getting late  
> But I'ma keep on dancing 'til I feel okay  
> So keep on playing that song that I don't like  
> I just wanna feel normal for the night"

To say she was a little sleepy was an understatement. Annabeth had been running on 3 hours of sleep in total for the past week, relying on nothing but her anxiety to keep her awake. But then again, it had been like this for sometime now, so Annabeth was used to the lack of sleep and shaking hands.

At least that's what her name was.

It had started when her father and Helen had decided to switch their last name from Chase to DeLeón, her maiden name. They claimed it wasn't as generic as Chase, and made them seem more powerful. DeLeón meant "Of Lion," the so called king of the jungle, and that's exactly what they were trying to be. 

It only got worse when Helen had decided that Annabeth should have her first name changed as well, saying it would be something else to leave behind along with the hallucinations. Of course Annabeth hated this idea, and at the time she was still getting over the diagnosis, but she didn't have much of a choice. So, she became the lovely Victoria DeLeón, named after Helen's mother.

And they didn't stop there, instead moving on to dye her once golden hair brown, and getting her blue color contacts to hide the dull gray that lies beneath. Since her diagnosis, things began to change rapidly for her, and they haven't stopped changing since. 

Her parents had been quick to move her back to California, insisting that New York would just bring back bad memories. They were right, of course, but she still feels homesick, even after all this time away.

Taking care of herself had become more and more difficult for her, too. The only reason she got up in the morning, if she did sleep, is because her parents would force her too. She hardly ever ate, and when she did, it was in very small amounts.

But, instead of helping, her parents agreed it was better that way. They even changed her diet, and made her believe that being malnourished and only eating salads and fruit would help her keep a good figure. Her once comfy wardrobe, filled with sweatshirts and jeans were switched to form fitting dresses and skirts, her parents claiming she looked more attractive like that. 

And who was she to stop them? She had tried fighting at the beginning, but after three years of this, the manipulation and the hits she would receive when she disobeyed, it didn't seem worth the fight. So she became someone knew, the picture perfect daughter of the picture perfect family. But in her head, she knew that she would be Annabeth Chase first and foremost, and that's what she would call herself.

Victoria DeLeón had still become a well known name, especially to the many "fans" that tried to catch her attention. The number only increased as she was shoved more and more into the spotlight with the growing attention her parents were getting.

It didn't help that her father had a very important gala coming up, and demanded that she attend. Her father and Helen had started and ran their own technology and manufacturing company, where they did a lot of designing and building for things like cars, trains, and planes. Her father, the famous Mr. Frederick DeLeón, has also just published his second book about what Annabeth assumes is coding, seeing as that's his specialty, but really she can't be bothered to check with so much else going on.

Mr. DeLeón was planning to use this event to his advantage by getting closer to some other rich business men that would attend, and wanted his daughter to "entertain" their sons while there. But of course Annabeth knew what that really meant. Her job was to charm and flirt with them, until they were begging their fathers to contact the DeLeón family again for "business reasons." And lately, her father had been using that tactic quite a lot. 

That was the thing, they always came back, no matter how many times she led them on. There was something about her that had them all wishing for just a chance at the mysterious Victoria DeLeón. 

Many people had speculated that she only liked women, but even those attempts did nothing. She became a challenge in everyone's eyes, and the reward was great enough that no one even thought about giving up. Not only would they have her, but whatever money and fame that came with being associated with her family. 

She had been trying to get back into the dating game, and had met a very nice man named Jeremy Finch, whose parents had been growing closer to hers for the past few weeks. It had helped that he wasn't like many of the other men that tried to pursue her, and was instead much kinder and less obsessed with looks, whether it be hers or his. And he wasn't unattractive either. With his curly brown hair, hazel eyes, and straight white smile, it was hard for people not to be attracted to him. Apparently, he was an excellent football player, got good grades, respectful to her and her parents. Talking to him wasn't entirely unbearable, and any awkward silences were easily filled.

Jeremy was the picture perfect boyfriend, the kind of guy anyone would be lucky to have. She should have been glad to be the girl that caught his attention, after all Annabeth would prefer to spend the rest of her life with someone that wasn't and egotistical jerk like the rest of them were. 

But no matter how hard she tried to get butterflies at his laugh, to keep smiling for hours even after he had gone, she still didn't feel anything. She hated it. And she hated herself for feeling this way. 

Some nights, when she was left alone with her thoughts and couldn't seem to fall asleep, instead stepping onto her balcony and staring at the stars, she could almost imagine Percy next to her. She could've sworn she heard him, felt him, probably joking about how she can't expect to sleep if she wasn't lying down. 

_He used to do that a lot,_ she remembered, on nights where tartarus decided were the perfect time to invade their minds, and they could do nothing but sit and try to get the other to sleep. But then she realized he wasn't real, and neither was tartarus, so could she really remember it when it never happened? 

It made her feel even more lonely, which was hard to do seeing as she was always alone these days. He had been apart of her life since they were 12, and the fact that he left so suddenly, without warning, without a goodbye, without one last I love you to help her get through everyday of the rest of her life without him to cheer her on or keep her safe or-

Annabeth her fingers were starting to go buzz, feeling like there was static at her finger tips, the same thing that always happens when she thinks too hard about her past life. She didn't even realize it was getting harder to breathe or that she was trembling, and not from the cold. 

She walked back into her room from under the night sky, hoping that she will be able to fall asleep this time. _Tomorrow,_ she thought. _Tomorrow I'll tell Jeremy I'm not ready for a relationship, and I can go on with my life._

A part of her wanted to keep seeing him, in hopes that maybe having him there would provide her some sense of safety and comfort, but she knew it wasn't fair to him. _Or Percy,_ her brain mentioned, accompanied with another jab in the back of her head.

And, like every other night when she finally managed to drift off to sleep, she dreamt of her friends, her old cabin and her siblings, her Percy. She dreamt of a home that was never hers. It didn't surprise her that she had tears tracked down her face in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Normal by Sasha Sloan
> 
> This is kinda long so skip if you want it's not important.
> 
> Alright just a few things, I want people to know that Annabeth's parents are going to be a lot darker in this story than originally, and I know they don't seem all that bad right now, but in all honesty this is my first story so I'm struggling a bit with writing it but I'll do my best. Also I've decided this will have a happy ending because I can't resist. Also I'm not happy with how this ended but what can you do. I already know how this story will go and have started writing bits and pieces of later chapters, so I'm hoping to have another one out in a couple days. Thank You!
> 
> ~ Chip


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I guess I have to face  
> That in this awful place  
> I shouldn't show a trace of doubt  
> But pulled against the grain  
> I feel a little pain  
> That I would rather do without  
> I'd rather be...  
> Free"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: 
> 
> There will be some triggering content in this chapter, so if you can't read the abuse or manipulation bits then there will be three little dots before and after in case you want to skip it. Stay safe!

"Victoria!" Annabeth cringed slightly at the use of her other name, like she always has, but did her best to not let it show on her face. 

"There you are," the one and only Jeremy Finch said as he ran up to her. "I'm sorry for my tardiness, did you wait too long?"

Annabeth shook her head, but couldn't bring herself to say anything just yet. She had called Jeremy and asked him to meet her at a little café he took her too on one of their dates, saying she had something important to discuss with him.

Jeremy went to place his order seeing as she already had hers, a green tea that Helen always got for her. She would have preferred coffee, or anything to keep her awake, but her step-mother said green tea was best, and it was meant to help her "slim down." 

While waiting, she thought of how to tell Jeremy she wasn't looking for a relationship, like she had been doing all day. She could always just say that, but she felt like she owed him a better explanation for getting his hopes up. 

It's not like she could tell him "Oh hey, sorry for making it seem like I was into you. I'm actually still in love with a hallucination and I'm positive I'll never love anyone else. Wanna just stay friends?" 

Hell, Annabeth hadn't even told the guy she's schizophrenic, how was she supposed to tell him she's still hung up on figments of her imagination? 

When he finally settled back into his chair with a coffee in hand, she decided to just bite the bullet. 

"Listen, these past few weeks have been wonderful and you really are a good guy, but I think I'm not in the right... mindset for a relationship right now. But it would be great if we could still be friends."

Jeremy continued to stare at her for what felt like and hour, but was most definitely just a few seconds. "Right, uhm, of course. I get it, as long as we can remain friends I'm happy." He didn't look like he completely believed himself, but at least he wasn't angry.

They smiled at each other, trying not to make it seem like they weren't affected by the extremely awkward fog that had drifted over them. Annabeth suggested they should part ways now, and he agreed to message her some time later to make plans again.

 _Right this is good,_ She thought when she got into a taxi to make her way back to the penthouse. _And I get a friend out of it, so what's the harm?_

But of course that's not what happened. Anyone could tell that they most definitely did not remain friends, they hardly even spoke to each other. It upset her a bit, that she had to go back to spending all her time alone, but now she didn't feel the overbearing sense of anxiety in her chest. 

Something about talking to other people always did that, but it was worse with Jeremy. If it were anyone else, she didn't worry as much about seeing them than she did with potential friends. She hated having to retell so many parts of her life to someone else. Her favorite color and food, how she is terrible at growing plants but desperately wants to. How she hates wearing big or dangle earrings because she's terrified they'll get caught on something and rip a chunk of her ear out. 

_Hazel used to think the same thing,_ she remembers when she finally steps back into the safety of her room. 

It was one of the few things they bonded over, how their curly hair would get knotted up into their earrings. Hazel had told her just how worried she was that one day, when she wasn't paying much attention, she would try to pull her hair back too hard when it was stuck to her earring, and her ear would tear. 

Annabeth had thought of this happening several times herself, and it was nice to finally have someone that could relate to her. Curly hair got tangled much too easily, and it was even easier for it to get stuck in bigger earrings. It was easier to have straight hair, like she did now, since it wouldn't tangle into the earring so much.

That Christmas, she and Hazel each got the other a pair of stud earrings, Hazel getting little yellow flowers, and Annabeth with white butterflies. _I wonder if I can find the same pair,_ she pondered. 

Looking at what she had on now, a set of long diamond earrings that reached just under her jaw, she still felt the slightest bit afraid. It was easier now though, seeing as her hair was always straightened to perfection per Helen's request. 

Under the brown hair, she could just barely see the slightest bit of gold peaking out at her scalp. That only made her think of Piper, who lectured Annabeth for half an hour straight when she said she might dye her hair brown. It was after a new camper made a joke on how surprised they were that some "dumb blonde" could be the daughter of the goddess of wisdom. It hadn't been at all original, and many of her siblings were blonde themselves, but that didn't stop him from saying it.

 _That's the best part of you looking like a stereotypical California girl,_ Piper had told her. _With eyes like that, and a brain like yours, it makes it so much more fun when you show people just how smart you really are. The look on their faces when you start talking about whatever random knowledge you have up there is one of this world's greatest treasures._

And it helped. Annabeth knew she was smart, and how people perceive her would never change that, but hearing other people confirm it made her feel like it was really true. 

She wanted to go back to her old hair color, or at least have it curly again, and she tried to, once. It didn't go great.

It didn't even go decently. It was after another one of her father's parties, where one of the women there mentioned how her hair was a slightly different color at its roots. Her father was quick to change the subject though, for reasons Annabeth couldn't figure out. Helen had then told him it was getting late and she was ready to leave, but he wanted to stay longer to mingle, so Helen took Annabeth back to the penthouse they lived in. 

Annabeth could tell Helen was upset to have to leave without her husband by her side, but said nothing. She was already fairly drunk as it was, and Annabeth knew from past experiences that getting her angry while in this state was never good. 

So she chose what she thought was a better topic, her hair.

... 

“Helen? I have a question.”

Her stepmother barely gave her a glance before nodding, giving her permission to continue as they stepped inside the car her father had gotten. 

“I was wondering… after what the lady said, about my hair, wouldn't it be easier for me to keep it as it naturally is? That way we wouldn't have to spend so much money getting it redone, and it wouldn't take up your time-”

“Why on earth would we do that? I pay good money to do something _nice_ for you, and what, you suddenly don't want me to?” She was starting to look a bit annoyed, and Annabeth was already regretting her choice, but there was no going back now.

“No, that's not it, I'm very grateful for what you've done, I just thought it would make things easier on you, and instead you could use the money on more important things.” Helen opened her mouth to say something back, but that's when the driver said they were at their destination. She simply shook her head and got put the car, not bothering to wait for Annabeth as she stepped inside the building. 

They rode up the elevator in silence, and Annabeth almost believed she had a fighting chance at winning the argument. 

Helen continued walking towards their doorway without a single word or glance at Annabeth, slipping the key into the lock and heading straight for the kitchen. When Annabeth entered right behind her, she already felt that same tug in her stomach that made her want to run for her life. It felt exactly like it did when her demigod senses screamed at her to run, knowing a monster was creeping in. But this was the real world, and the only thing waiting for its moment to pounce was her stepmother.

Annabeth watched in silence as Helen grabbes an almost empty wine bottle from the shelf, pouring the rest into the glass and taking a long sip, staring straight at Annabeth the whole time. 

But it was her own fault, really. Expecting that Helen would be fair for once. 

It took her a second too long to notice Helen picking up the empty bottle and hurling it straight towards Annabeth’s head. She was lucky though, because even when not drunk, Helen usually never hit her target, and it smashed to pieces at the wall behind her. 

She didn’t dare move, not even taking her eyes off the person in front of her. Annabeth knew now that no matter what she had said, Helen always had a terrible temper, and she would let out her aggression anyway she wanted. 

“Do you have _any_ idea how hard your father and I work? To give you a good life, to dress you, and feed you, make sure you’re warm and comfortable?” 

Annabeth could feel it now, her heart starting to slam against her ribcage, the sick feeling in her stomach.

Helen picked up her glass, taking another sip before continuing.

“This whole time, we have been doing all we can to make sure you have everything you need, to ensure that you don't _ruin_ this family with your insanity, and _still,_ you can't take one fucking second to be _thankful_?” 

It terrified her, how low Helen could keep her voice, and still sound as threatening as she did. 

Still, she didn't speak, instead looking down at the ground, begging to whatever god or gods that did exist out there to make sure this doesn't end how it usually does, to de-escalate this before her father gets there and does something worse.

That was her next mistake, taking her eyes off Helen when she still had the glass in her hand. She must not have been as drunk as she seems, because this time, she was right on target.

The rest of the night was a blur, as it always was when her brain began trying to shut everything out. She remembers looking at her arm, a large gash close to her wrist, already flowing out blood. She knows Helen disappeared immediately after, so she took that as her chance to run up to her room and stop the bleeding as quickly as possible. Looking at it now, there were small spots of red peaking out on the bandage she had wrapped around it, but thankfully it didn't hurt too bad now.

... 

She slowly edged out of bed, swallowing a couple painkillers before taking her antipsychotics nexts. _Just like any other night,_ she told herself. _I shouldn't have expected anything else._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Escapism from Steven Universe
> 
> This chapter was hard to get through, but I'm happy to say that I don't think it's completely terrible. Sorry for getting so sad at the end, I can't promise the next chapter will be much happier, but it won't be any sadder.
> 
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> ~ Chip


End file.
